Thursday, February 21, 2008

let's get (meta)physical!

Since the first Mercury retrograde this year is finally over, & we’ve had fun last Lunar New Year, & we’re expecting a new leap year in a few days, I can finally update this blog as I please. I’ve managed to finish 2 e-mailed readings in one go (after much delay, though, yikes!) & handle a phoned-in request quite well so I’m extremely happy of my progress. I’m afraid this will be the last time I’m doing freebies (unless I offered you a free session because you were kind enough to pay me first & then refer me to a good friend of yours or so ♥).

Anyway, I have decided to come up with a few ground “rules” for up-close-&-personal appointments for everybody’s comfort & benefit (especially my own peace of mind) as we all want quality readings, don’t we?
1). I cannot tolerate al fresco settings anymore, especially when I do readings around brunch/lunchtime. Unless we’re meeting up in a really cozy area, we’ll have to make do with airconditioning & lounge tunes, hehe. Especially in this godforsaken heat which we have no choice but to lovingly call perpetual tropical summer weather. If you’re stricken with a chronic smoking problem, you will have to enjoy your cigarette before &/or after our session. I have enough breathing & concentration problems as it is, so please, have mercy.

2). Please enclose your payments in a RED envelope, along with a wish you want granted (not by me, of course, but by the cosmos! :D) scribbled in the envelope along with your signature. I usually carry a spare bag where customers could all slip in their bills after their turn, & I’ll try to tote around my own stash of red envelopes for your convenience, but if you can, kindly comply.

3). Do not shuffle my cards as if you’re going to challenge me for a round of poker or gin rummy… & try to concentrate on your intentions while shuffling my deck as carefully as possible. Also, you can only look at ALL the cards after we’ve concluded our reading. If you want to know what the rest of the cards of a certain deck looks like, at least do your research online, unless I get chummy enough with you (more often than not I probably will be) that you can go through my stuff as much as you want. Oh, & please have CLEAN hands. If you must eat, do so after shuffling. & you have a cold, you might as well try to get well first before seeing me, or let’s just talk online (since there’s always PayPal & other electronic means, hehe). I’m only human, & flu shots can only do so much. I would want to share your pain at some point, but not your cooties ever, sorry. Yeah, yeah, I know, I’m fugly & I have dust bunnies in my huge bag, but that’s not calling it quits.

4). I welcome feedback very much, & I appreciate if you can tell me how much my reading has made an impression on you, at the very least. Don’t forget, I offer birthday specials, by the way, so…

5). Please be patient with me if your request via e-mail takes more than 72 hours. That means I’m trying to gain more perspective on your complex dilemma, or that I’m too ill to proceed. Rest assured I’ll deliver very soon. Usually it only takes up to 48 hours for me to respond.

6). Before I would strongly advise a follow-up session only after 2-3 months for optimum results. Now I welcome visits as soon as after every 2 weeks. I understand how lack of clarity & insight can drive people up the wall for answers & relief, so I’m offering my services when one most needs it. It’s cathartic for me as well, anyway. But, please, for the love of God, if the cards' messages are just repeating themselves, better take heed, FAST. & try to wait for at least 3-4 weeks more before your next appointment.

7). If you’re up for it just because you want me to convince you that tarot can change your life, in the same fashion that you would want to see me walk on water or blow up a neighboring skyscraper by just snapping my fingers or turn water into wine or levitate or make dead people reappear holographically or make a million dollars rain all over the sidewalk, I’m afraid I’m only going to let you down, whether we both like it or not. Go find your own freak show.

That’s it for now. I hope everybody understands. More posts later.
Today has been a very busy day, but thank God for Sleepasil.

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